Don’t You Want to See?

Learning never stops. If you are not growing and learning you are either dormant or you are dying. Many times we come to a state of dormancy, where we seem to stay for a while, and that is okay. But we must be careful in that state not to drift into the wake of death which can happen without our realizing it.

 

My struggle with the teachings of the organized church has led me to times of feeling completely lost and as though I knew absolutely nothing. At times I felt I must be completely ignorant or possibly deceived, but never satisfied and truly wanting answers.

 

My search has brought me full circle to a time in my life when I realized that church is supposed to be an expression of our Creator’s heart for those He created, not a lifeless meeting where one person shares their learning and growth and everyone else just sits and marvels at how much that one person enjoys or knows, but never really participates, nor even sees themselves as being able to get there. It is also supposed to be something that is alive, breathing, relating to the Creator, living in dialogue as well as taking care of business, getting things done, meeting the needs of people, providing a safe and healing place for those in need. And most importantly, I am the church, it is not a place that you attend, it is your life.

 

I realize now that my purpose in the earth is to just be an outward expression of a somewhat invisibile God. Because He is only invisible until you learn how to see. And yes, though our physical eyes just do their job, our spiritual eyes do not.  There is a spiritual set of senses that can be used as adeptly as the physical ones, possibly even more; and that is what I am supposed to do. Learn how to use mine, and show others how to use theirs.

 

There was a time years ago that I sat around a table with friends sharing in the stories that we had heard from what we considered great prophets, and/or leaders in the church. But though I had done that many times before, this night was different. This time as the conversation continued and I heard story after wonderful story, I became more and more agitated and even angry. Finally, I reached a point that I couldn’t take it anymore. I slammed my hand down on the table startling everyone and almost shouted, “Enough! I am sick of hearing all these great things that have happened to other people. I want my own experiences and my own stories to tell of what has happened to me, what I have seen God do!”

 

Here I am years later with my own experiences and many wonderful stories of what God has done in my life, through my life, and in others that I have been able to witness. If you want to, also, let’s talk about it.  

Super-natural?

In a previous post I shared how my grandson at 2 1/2 years old had a wonderful experience of overcoming dark forces during a dream encounter. In that experience he was able to kill snakes that had been brought by monsters to torment him. I also shared how he had said that he had seen and talked to his great-grandmother who had passed away 6 months before his birth.

 

Just recently he and I were riding in my car and I asked him, “Have you been to see Jesus yet?” He reponded very matter of factly, “Yeah”.  “You did?” I responded, a little surprised I must admit. “What did he do when you saw him?” I asked. He responded, “Just talked to me.” “Really?” I said, “What did he say?” Just as matter of factly as before, he responded, “No snakes at my house!”

 

This may not seem like a big deal, but it is quite interesting considering that the snake event happened last summer when he was only 2 1/2. Now he is just over 3 and we haven’t really discussed the snake event since it happened. Because his night terrors ended there was no reason to bring it up again. For him to give that particular response leads me to conclude that the conversation really took place.

 

So why is it that children seem so easily able to enter the spirit realm and enjoy the supernatural? Is that what Jesus was referring to when he said that if we wanted to enter his kingdom we must become like little children? Can the supernatural really become a natural part of our experience?

 

I think so.

Game of Life

This was sent to me by my sister:

Picture this in your imagination:1 – There’s the board, the chips, and the players. On the sidelines, the game master sits back and watches.2 – Each player at the table starts out by being given chips that represent talents, gifts, and/or skills with which he can play the game. 3 – Each player is also given chips representing his environment where he will have to start out. (example: great or bad family)4 – No one is allowed to leave and go home until the game master says he can.

The really fascinating part of the game is that no player is told how the game works. He just takes his chips and tries to figure it out as he goes. They all look at each other, scratch their heads, take their turn rolling the dice, and begin to move their pieces on the game board.

Just like in Monopoly, at times their roll lands them on a spot where they have to draw a card from a stack, and the card tells them what they must do next or gives them unexpected choices or rewards. Drawing the card is just luck, good or bad. The game master controls what you get in your card. 

On each roll of the dice, they move along the board or stand still. The little road on the board only shows up as they take their turn so consequently they only see a short distance ahead. There is an invisible straight road to the goal, but many dead end side roads, but just like a rat in a maze they can’t tell which is which until they try them out. So they gradually learn as they go. Some figure out that they want to quit and not roll their dice any more in the stupid game and just sit the rest of the game out. But that’s against the rules and once started, no one is allowed to quit the game. So the game master then steps in and rolls them for him anyway.

As time goes by, with past experiences to build upon, each one figures out what he thinks the purpose of the game is and what works best for him to reach that goal. Some pride themselves in getting really good at it. However when those folks finally reach the goal that they thought the game was about, they find that the feeling of winning quickly fades. So confused, they realize they really haven’t won yet, so what they believed to be the purpose of the game, is mistaken. So with all the chips they’ve won so far along the way, they re-think their strategy and start again from where they are on the board.

Some just don’t ever seem to figure it out, and after a while the game master just steps in and lets them go home. Some figure it out early on, find the prize, win, and the game is over, and the game master lets them go home, a winner!

Some figure it out, win, and the game master allows them to stay and watch the rest of the game with the master by their side. But this doesn’t last long because right away the player is so happy with his prize that he wants to jump back in and share with the others and so he asks the game master to allow him go back to the game and coach the players in how it all works so they can win too. But by this time the other players have been in the game so long that each thinks he has figured out the game, knows how to win and each thinks he knows what the prize is, and so most  won’t listen.

The visitor tries everything to convince them that he knows the way and has found the prize … “come on with me and I’ll show you!” Only a few even turn their heads to listen at all. The young ones who have not yet even begun to figure out the game are the best listeners, and many of those learn quickly from the winner. But they must test out what they have learned by using that information in continuing the game. Only through experiencing the game does one progress. Learning is great, but only in doing does one move along the board.

So this winner who was wildly happy with his prize at first, learns as he tries to help the others to also find it, that something is missing. He goes back to the game master in frustration and says, “Help. On my own I can do nothing to get them to listen to me about how to win the game. They just won’t listen. Won’t you please come with me and help me to make them listen?”  The game master laughs and says, “So you thought you had already won. Winning only for yourself is a false prize. Now, in your request to share the prize, you have actually won the game and found the real prize, and that particular game is ended. You’ve won!”

THE NEXT GAME:

You now also have a choice. If you choose, you can get into another game requiring more skills and it has a much bigger prize. In this one all the players have me (the game master) by their sides coaching them and helping them along. If you choose to play, in this game you will still learn more of the same original lessons, (forgiveness, unconditional love, and how things work)… but here compassion must also be learned for those at the table with you, who you expect too much from when they are not playing the game to your own satisfaction. Here you’ll have to deal with your own judgment of others and with pride in your own skills in the game as compared to their’s.  You’re all running the race for the same prize and shoving or in any way harming each other is not allowed or you lose ground. Stopping to help another in the race, actually gives you more speed so that you move along faster in the long run.

 The game:To figure out the meaning of life. The purpose:

Learning & changing – The game master wrote it to cause each individual to grow in compassion, mercy, and love.

 The prize:

To join with the game master, and take part in running the game in hopes that as many as possible might win in the end.

 Why?

Because God is Love, and He is our creator, and He is teaching His children to grow into his likeness but to do this by “choices.”

 When our time comes to die, and we face the Light, Raymond Moody, who wrote 2 books on near death experiences of hundreds of people, said, that we will be asked 3 questions:

1 – What have you done with your life that you want to show me?

2 – What have you learned about how things work?

3 – What have you learned about love?

What will be your answer?

What Does All This Mean?

Life is hard enough to figure out sometimes, but then you add to that the need to figure out what your dreams mean? Do you ever wake up wondering, what was all that about? I do more times than I care to admit.

There’s a wonderful language that I am working on learning that I call “Dreamspeak”. It is a key to the meanings of the messages given in dreams and is at times tricky, but can be learned. What does it take to learn it? Determination. That really is the key, for as you know, anything worth having is worth working for.

I am currently compiling and preparing a Dreamspeak Symbol Book to assist those who are struggling with the language. The more I work on it, the more there is to add to it. Language is such a wonderful and interesting thing.

Just don’t give up. Keep working on it; thinking about patterns, journaling your journey and you will be fluent before you know it.

Angels, Angels, Everywhere

I have heard it said as a solace that when Lucifer fell and he took 1/3 of the angels with him, we are still left with a 2 to 1 advantage. There would still be 2 good angels for every 1 that fell with him.

I hadn’t thought of it until recently, but God has never lost even a drop of His creative power, so whose to say that God didn’t just make more angels to fill up the loss and even make more to make sure that Lucifer and his gang are completely outnumbered!

How’d He Know That?

My son, Jacob, called his sister at work and asked when she would be home. He said, “I am sitting at Starbucks and thought its been a while since I saw Logan. I’d like to come by and see him when you get home.” She said that would be fine and told him what time to come. 

 She picked up Logan at daycare and headed for home not having mentioned anything to him about his uncle coming over. While riding toward home, Logan picked up his plastic pretend cell phone and began punching numbers. He put it to his ear and said, “Uncle Jake!” and began to have a pretend conversation. His mother thought that was odd.  She stopped at a red light and Logan piped up, “Mama I want to go to Starbucks!” Now she knew something was happening.

The only explanation is that Logan was picking up vibes or whatever you want to call them, coming from his uncle. This is just another one of those things that make you go “HHHhhhhhmmmmmmmm!”

What’s a Mother to Do?

My son has decided to join the Marines. He knows what he wants and he is going for it. He is very smart and scored well on their testing and can pretty much pick what area he wants to go into.

He will go into basic training for 13 weeks, then he has been told that it is a sure thing that he will go to either Iraq or Afghanistan. My family has a long history of its men going off to war. No offense to anyone but it has just happened that none of the females have ever gone into the military.

I have always taken the stand that once my children reach a certain age they must make their own decisions, chart their own course, learn their lessons, make their mistakes, and I would support them as much as I can, only offering my opinion when asked. In this situation I have done just that as well.

But I am finding that I am an emotional wreck. I guess because this decision is not only going to effect my son’s life but may cause the end of it. So what is a mother to do? I have been blessed with one step-son and seven children I have birthed. The thought of losing a child is more than I can even attempt to imagine.

There was a time that I supported the war in Iraq and defended President Bush. But as time has gone on, I am finding that I am more and more fed up with the war and want our guys to get out of there. This change in my thinking happened even before my son made his decision.

When I was carrying my son, I gave him to God, he was dedicated in our bed upon birth (at home) as we toasted his arrival. He has grown into a wonderful young man, of whom, I am very proud. I know God has a destiny upon him and wants him to enjoy a full life.

So, here is the rub; and the steeling of my own faith. Just how much do I trust God? How willing am I to fully turn my son over to God and allow whatever He sees fit to happen in his life?

I think like Abraham of the Ancient Writings; I am about the take a journey up a long and lonely mountain. The problem is not so much the incline or the physical pain in walking such a distance, but the pain in my heart because I know at the top of the mountain, I must lay my son down upon the altar. As difficult as it is; if I can allow him to die there, then the worry of his death has no more power over me.  I would much rather have him lay his life down there (in the very presence of a loving God) than any other spot on the planet.

For some this may sound like mad ramblings. But for me it is my way of taking those heavy steps. If you have anything in your life that you are struggling with and know that you must find the answer to; come, let’s go together; or better yet, I’ll see you at the top!

Spiritual Warfare

I have mentioned my grandson before, explaining his uncanny perception of spiritual things. Following is one of my favorite stories of his exploits at the tender age of 2 1/2 years.

For about a two month period, Logan was waking up screaming and at times was afraid to go to bed. He pointed to the same place in his bedroom window and said there was a monster there. I believe he was seeing a dark watcher outside his window so we prayed and anointed his room and tried to soothe his fears. My daughter would pray with him and command it to leave whenever he was bothered by it but it did not seem to help.

One Saturday I went to pick him up and he greeted me by saying, “Nana, last night the monsters came and they bringed snakes, and the snakes bit me and I died!” I thought I must have misheard him so I had him repeat it which he did exactly the same. I said, “Oh no, Logan the next time the monsters or the snakes come you take your sword and you chop their heads off and you tell them that Jesus said NO!” He seemed fine with that and we went about a day as usual.

The next weekend when I saw him he ran over to me and stated very matter of factly, “Nana, the monsters came again and they brought the snakes, but I got my sword and I chopped off their heads and I said Jesus said NO!” I said, “Logan that is great, I bet your angel helped you.” He replied, “No Nana, not just one angel, I had two angels help me.”

To date he has not had another night terror of any kind.

Contact with the Other Side

I spend a lot of time lately pondering things. Generally I am very busy but it seems if I have any “down time” I can’t help but wonder about things about which I have questions.  As a follower of God, lover of Jesus, I am very interested in the supernatural and those things that seem abnormal or paranormal.

It has been said that small children have much easier access to the spirit realm due to their innocence, and I believe it is true. One of my grandsons has had several unique and powerful experiences that seem only to be explained by his ability to see in the spirit realm and perceive things spiritual.

There have been many confirmations of the gifting that is upon this child but it seems to have stepped up in the last few months.  To understand the unusual nature of his experiences, I offer this background.  My mother, his great grandmother died a full 6 months before his birth. She had told my daughter that she knew she was carrying a boy and was very excited about him coming. My mother was called grandmother. No one else in the family uses that name. My husband and I are known as Nana and Papa to my grandson and as his mother is single, he has no other grandparents.

One day last week my grandson had taken a nap and when he got up, he walked in to the kitchen and told his mom, “Grandmother says hi!” My daughter was a little freaked out to say the least, and she asked him what he had said and had he seen her. He replied by repeating it and added, “Uh huh, my grandmother loves me!”

I had him with me last weekend and though I had not mentioned anything about this experience to him, as we were walking to my room he suddenly stopped and pointed to a photo that is part of a collage of pictures that covers one hallway wall. In the photo was grandmother and me taken about 12 years ago sitting in lawn chairs. He pointed to grandmother and said, “That’s my grandmother.” I said, “it is? Have you seen her?” He responded, “Yeah.”

This child is only 3 years old but he is very aware of any changes in his surroundings. He is very aware of shadows and will almost always look at them asking, “What is that?” When he senses something he doesn’t like he will comment that there are monsters there.

I can’t help but be astounded at his ability to perceive things unseen and I am convinced that some how he saw his grandmother while he was asleep and actually heard her speak.

Love

I came upon some old poetry and wanted to share it here. This was originally written in May of 2005.

When I am dead and gone
And my memory lingers on
I would hope that there is one thing you would say
 
That no matter what you said, how you felt or what you did 
You were sure that I would love you anyway.

  
For in all the times of tears and the struggles through the years
When it seemed that we kept going separate ways
 

There was always this one thing
That could soothe the deepest sting
And remind us that we only have today……love.

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